In the event of a crash, look for your life rafts
- nickinoo873
- Jun 9, 2022
- 3 min read
This post has been a long time coming. I’ve had the title written for months but just haven’t got round to actually writing it. The title for this post is inspired by something someone said during the weekly PND Hour on Twitter that I used to get involved in each week and it seemed even more appropriate to me as ex Cabin Crew.
This person in particular mentioned that during some of her darkest days, she clung to her friends and family as if they were her life rafts and I remember thinking that it was actually a really good way of looking at your support network.
The last couple of days have also been a bit strange and I know that writing helps clear my mind. The last few days I’ve felt a bit low and a bit sad. Thankfully these dips in my mood are really few and far between now but they still happen and every time I’m reminded of how fragile my brain still is. I’m reminded that when it comes to mental illness, the phrase ‘I’m better’ might never be uttered. Instead I’ll just get to a point where I’m feeling much more like my old self and I’ve accepted that there are going to be good and bad days.
My friends and family have always been amazing and I don’t think I will ever truly be able to repay them for everything they’ve done for me particularly since having Little A. There are people who have most certainly acted as my life rafts and I know without doubt that I wouldn’t be here without them. It’s one of the most important things when you’re struggling with your mental health, that you have people who will climb down into the dark hole with you and be there by your side whilst you climb back up into the light. People who don’t necessarily understand what you’re going through but who would do anything to make sure you’re not on your own. I’m so thankful I have a group of people who have been there during my tough days and have helped me find my sparkle again.
Back in early January I set myself a couple of New Years resolutions and unlike every year before it, I’ve actually stuck to them. The first one was to shift some weight – to feel healthier and to feel comfortable in my own skin again. The second which I knew would work hand in hand with losing weight was to get my brain healthy again and I’m so pleased to say that I’ve achieved both. I still have lots more weight to lose but I’m getting there and I’m so proud of myself for sticking with it as losing weight when you’re at home every day with a toddler is unbelievably tough. My brain has also never felt healthier. I’m eating better and taking vitamins now and I’m slowly regaining the confidence that PND took from me. My anxiety is something I still have a daily battle with; some days are better than others but aside from the last few days my mood has remained pretty stable which is just amazing.
Mr N has spent the last few months sorting out our garden transforming the patio and laying artificial grass and it’s such a lovely space now for Little A to play. We’ve had some nice days and we’ve been able to get out and enjoy it and our new house finally feels like home; it’s only taken almost 9 months.
I seem to have rambled on which happens a lot but I thought whilst I was writing I may as well give you an update on how things are especially as I haven’t posted in a while.
I also realised that it was my blogs two year anniversary on 24 May. Two years of writing down my thoughts and releasing them to the World. This blog is something I’m so proud of and I hope it will continue to help others.
I’ve thanked my loved ones over and over again throughout my blogs but no amount of words can ever truly explain how grateful I am for you all. I don’t need to name names or even mention why they’re important individually. You’ll know who you are. In some of my darkest times, I wasn’t sure if I could continue into another day but with the support of some very special people, I did carry on, knowing that I’m surrounded by my life rafts who will never ever let me drown.
コメント