Being a Stay at Home Mum

“I know stay at home mums and I know career mums but I have yet to meet a mum who doesn’t work” – Momstheworst

I saw this quote recently on Social Media and it inspired me to write this post.

I’m currently a Stay at Home Mum and it’s definitely not a walk in the park like I once believed it would be. Before I got pregnant, I had all these ideas about all the things me and Little A would do together. I obviously had no idea that Covid would strike or that I would suffer with PND as bad as I have.

Lots of my Mum friends have gone back to work. Actually most of them have. It’s so interesting talking to them about the struggles they have having to juggle working and being a Mum at the same time. These are struggles I cannot appreciate as I don’t need to juggle. Little A is my sole focus every day and I don’t have to worry about having to put 100% into being a Mummy as well as 100% into my career. I’m very thankful for that. I’m not sure how I would cope recovering from a mental illness as well as having to balance everything else on top.

As thankful as I am that I don’t have to juggle, it doesn’t make being a stay at home Mum any easier. This job is 24 hours a day with no breaks. It’s full on and exhausting. Having to think of ways to entertain a very small person for hours on end. My Mum friends who work are able to step away for 7 hours a day and be themselves whereas I’m always Little A’s Mummy. Sometimes it can be hard to remember that I was a person before I had a baby and that person still matters. I never really get any ‘me’ time and that can be hard.

Covid hasn’t helped with matters. All of our local church toddler groups aren’t running and any classes that are in place get booked up so far in advance. We have been going to our local Soft Play which Little A absolutely loves and it’s a few hours where he can crawl around with other little people and have fun. It’s a few hours where I don’t need to try and think of new ways to entertain him.

My previous jobs have all been hard work in their own ways. Flying was physically demanding; you’re on your feet for long periods and working in a confined space with lots of people and my most recent role in Pensions Admin was mentally tiring. None of that though compares to my current job of Little A’s Mummy.

Whilst being a Stay at Home Mum is the toughest job I’ve ever had, it is also the most rewarding. I get paid in cuddles. I get to watch Little A grow and develop every day. I will never miss any of his firsts and I will be by his side for everything. I’m very grateful for that.

Our bond wasn’t instant; it took a long time before I felt anything for him; before I felt any kind of connection. I'm so lucky that now I get to make up for everything we didn’t have in the early days.

Postnatal Depression robbed me of so much but I will not let it take anymore.